Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. Im jealous of all the people that havent met you. "I'm sorry, I don't speak with the piece of shit that I dodge on the sidewalk." Heres a tissue, you have a little piece of sh*t on your lips. Im jealous of people that dont know you! If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms. Ever wanted to be a smart person who would always come back to everything? Every time I'm next to you, I get a fierce desire to be alone. Usually people live and learn. "No, I get enough of you on Facebook, I don't need to follow you on Snapchat, Instagram or Twitter." Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 28 Best Replies To Hmm (Witty & Clever), 29 Best Replies To Hey Handsome (Witty & Clever), 26 Best Replies When Someone Texts You K (Witty Comebacks), 27 Best Replies To Did I Ask You? (Funny & Clever), 10 Polite Ways to Say Pay for Your Own Meal, 9 Other Ways to Say Im Good At on a Resume, 10 Polite Ways to Say No Visitors after Surgery, 11 Best Ways to Say Im Here for You to a Loved One, 10 Professional Ways to Say I Am Not Feeling Well. Youre so stupid it might sprain your brain. Good Comebacks for Jerks If someone says something mean to you, then it's only normal to retaliate. Dont let your mind be distracted. Well, Id better go find the best looking guy then! If I would accept you as you are I had to lie to myself that I liked you. Any friend of yours - is a friend of yours. Nah, youll be fine. Rude Jokes, 60. I dont know where you look. Good story, but in what chapter do you shut up? 1. It's not working out." Youre about as useful as a screen door on a submarine. 8. Husband: "Hey babe, you smell that?" Worry about your eyebrows. Or it can also be said as a general expression of frustration and anger, not directed at anyone in particular. Is that comment meant to offend me? Tag: dirty minded comebacks. 20. 79. impressed! now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Im an acquired taste. I want you to leave. Its kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. Insult: "You need a new brain dummy" I hope you find someone who is good looking, honest, smart and cultural. 27+ Savage Comebacks when Someone Insults You. Sometimes, you might be in a goofy mood or just want to laugh, so when someone tells you smd, you decide to give them a witty response. 3. "Why don't you show more confidence and less arrogance." I think you already know that you are a social worker. Youre a conversation starter. Lucky for you, they cant laugh, either. 4. Ouch. Wanna take the joke a little far? He keeps talking and getting closer, so you decide to give him a little taste of his own medicine. Clinic. No, the 3rd one down. Long story short, because you wouldnt be able to follow with the long one. 70. 5. This will likely leave them dumbfounded. Don't hold yourself back from saying what you're thinking. "You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing." If you want a man whos committed, go look in a mental hospital. Pay no heed to it. No thanks, I have a toothpick already. You couldnt pour piss out of a boot if the directions were on the bottom. 2. Ive heard you like to talk big. Then you will be ready to win every argument. Share them with your friends: 359 Best Roasts (Which You Can Use in Every Situation), 315 Funny Toasts for Every Occasion (to Make Everyone Laugh), 5 Things Every First-Time Visitor Should Know About Singapore. You arent worth the amount of money it would have cost to abort you. Wherever you are! dirty minded comebacks May 11, 2022 | How is a woman like a road? Stand still so I can hit you with my truck. Guy: So what do you do for a living?Girl: Female impersonator. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. If I throw a stick, will you leave? If you dont want a sarcastic answer, dont ask a stupid question. Like my dog. You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail. Nice dress. Woman: "If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee." The greatest loss is you. Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go. I dont have the time or the crayons to explain this to you on your level. If not, you risk becoming the very entity you sought to eradicate. Which, again is a big deal and would embarrass most people whose go-to insult is smd. Feb 15, 2013 - Image discovered by Ins. Read more about Martin here. You cant fix ugly. This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by suggesting that you are too expensive for them to handle. "How did you slip into the gene pool? Of course, when you use your comebacks, you must be strategic. Ive seen you before but last time I had to pay the entrance fee. 3. You're just mad that your dad's pussy is pinker than yours. Clever Funny Insults. You cant take a joke. This is a fourth witty comeback that works great because it is attacking the size of the d you were just offered to suck. Her mouth moved, but I only heard blah blah blah?? Wife: "I have changed my mind." 66. Please tell me you dont plan to home-school your kids. You make me increase the amount of caffeine I take daily. 28. I would prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed. Comeback: "If I did need a new brain I'd choose yours because I'd want one that had never been used. Guy: 5 inches deep in your mom! So next time you find yourself in a heated debate, dont sweat it. Damn it, why didnt she think of it earlier! Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people. Id say youre funny, but looks arent everything. 26. I found it in my business. Too bad your penis is small. Why should I take all the credit? Brains arent everything. The witty comeback works because it is implying that the persons d is dirty and you dont want to be anywhere near it. Sorry, I dont date guys with more issues than Vogue. I see you choose this time to humiliate oneself in public. Then we are content to be alone. Whats the latest dope besides you? Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic. When I want your opinion, Ill rattle your cage! When they made you, they broke the mold and beat the mold maker. When you die, Id like to go to your funeral, but Ill probably have to go to work that day. Boy: Fuck you, you little bitch! Girl: Shall I put the TV on?Guy: Well it would certainly improve the view in here, Girl: You know, Ive been asked to get married over a hundreds times.Guy: Yeah, but your parents dont count. Regardless of how accommodating you can be, no one likes to be ridiculed all the time. "Kiss My Ass!" You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen. I seem to be overestimating the number of brain cells you have. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. Id love to insult you, but I wont do as well as nature did. Hey Justin here, Thanks for visiting my blog. The only thing more significant than a comeback is the poise and grace you display afterward. 97. 5. 18. A nasty comeback doesnt require much ingenuity. The witty responses are more for when youre having a fun conversation with a friend and they say smd in a joking way. Oops, my bad; I could've sworn I was dealing with an adult. And someone tried to get a baseball bat. "You deserve better and so do I" Go right in. When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price? When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, Ill say it was your stupidity. When you talk, other people get hoarse just listening. Why dont you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance? Why dont you slip into something more comfortable like a coma. Your secrets are always safe with me. Take my lowest priority and put yourself beneath it. You are like the sunnot because you light up my world, but because it hurts to look at you. Small Guy: That's why your mom's breath is so minty. I want you on the other side of it. Girl: I love biscuitsGuy: Thats because youre crackers! We can always tell when you are lying. Did someone leave your cage open? I dont know what makes you so stupid, but it really works! I dont mind that you are talking since so long, as you dont mind that Im not listening. I dont think you are a fool. I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral. Q: What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman? Clever responses are better for when you are maybe annoyed or angered by the person who said smd and you want to one-up them with a clever response that makes you look smart. Oh, I didnt realize youre an expert in my life and how I should live it. , 15 Signs a Friend Is Using You & Draining the Happiness Out of You. 33. 23 Fresh Memes of the Dankest Kind 11,223. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldn't be enough to blow your hat off. Guy: Is this seat empty?Girl: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down. So nobody understands you.. it isnt art but stupidity. Your presence keeps covering it up. He also chases his tail for entertainment. I dont speak bullsh*t. Youre so skinny; I hear the sound of bone on wood when you sit. Guy: What sign were you born under?Girl: No Parking. 64. The people who tolerate you daily are the real heroes. Youre so ugly the only dates you get are on a calendar. You are a day late and a dollar short. Any friend of yours is a friend of yours. Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you? If you spoke your mind, youd be speechless. If people stand close enough to you, they must be able to hear the ocean. If you were twice as smart, youd still be stupid. Keep talking. Have insults and a tactful return ready just in case. Be ready. Thats the essence of it.. I hope it has helped you make the right decision. If I had a dollar for every time you said something brilliant, Id be broke. A clever response can be to pretend to not understand the statement. 9. Everyone touches you, but nobody wants you. I noticed the improvement immediately. You are so dishonest that I cant even be sure that what you tell me are lies! You are so dumb, you need a cue card to say Huh? You are so dumb, you need instructions on how to use a rocking chair. You are so dumb, you planted a dogwood tree and expected a litter of puppies. You are so dumb, you play solitaire for cash. You are so old, if you to acted your age, youd die. Im a little busy right now. Your nasty behaviour is the reason for your receding hairline. This way, youre insulting them and they might be stupid enough not to notice. How do you get it to come out of your nostrils like that? I do not consider you a vulture. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright. So, a thought crossed your mind? 15. Sound effects from the star ships, computers and actors are here. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. Boyfriend says to group (friends)at a party "Yea, I m hung like a horse" My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle. If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant. Youre like the end pieces of a loaf of bread. With a chair. Its funny because everyone in there is a coward. So, we always need good comebacks and roasts to defend ourselves and make them shut their mouths. Download "Dirty mind" Sound: Download Sound. I couldve sworn I was dealing with an adult. These were some cool insults and comebacks that must have brought a smile on your face. Cosmic Ordering Secret Review Is it a Scam? For example: Suck my d*ck I got a 60 on the test.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_4',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. I only take you everywhere I go, so I dont have to kiss you goodbye. Don't like my sarcasm, well I don't like your stupid. Id rather treat my babys diaper rash than have lunch with you. Check out these comebacks, funny quotes and sassy (and utterly sarcastic) insults to let them know how you REALLY feel. Jesus might love you, but everyone else definitely thinks youre an idiot. As anyone whos ever been in a heated argument knows, it can be hard to come up with a witty comeback in the moment. Because your days are numbered!" They clap their hands over their eyes. You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel. Hey, your village called they want their idiot back. I was today years old when I realized I didnt like you. Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. Youre so dumb, I bet your dog teaches you tricks. This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by pretending that its something that youve been waiting for. Are you still single because no one will have you? 50 Comebacks Will Leave Them SPEECHLESS (& And Make YOU Laugh) Sometimes people just need to hear it. And I hope you stay there. Youre giving me the silent treatment? Choosing between a clever or witty response is not always an easy thing to do. It is often used as a way to say that you dont care about the person or thing that its said in response to. 24. "Revenge, I'm too lazy. Don't let any jerk get to you and see your weakness. 35 Best Dirty Jokes You Can Tell To Spread Laughter (For Adults Only) We all love the times we laughed so hard. Husband: "Only you, Darling with all the others I was awake." No thanks, I have a toothpick already. Turn hot dog water into ice cubes for people you dont like. Forcing the other person to awkwardly explain what they meant by suck my d*ck, likely making the flustered or embarrassed. Friend: What are you, 5? But beware, these comebacks are not for the faint of heart. You have miles to go before you reach mediocre. If youre going to act like a turd, go lay on the yard. A fool is the same all year round, and we celebrate you on April 1st. I think your mommy gave you a poor upbringing. You owe that tree an apology. Hey, you have something on your chin. Your kid is so annoying; he makes his Happy Meal cry. Hi! This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by presenting the next step to make it happen. Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yeah, thats why I dont go there anymore. The smartest thing to come out of your mouth was my c*ck. An Honest Review. If I wanted to hear from an asshole, Id fart. Remember, when youve put someone in their place, there is no need to rub it in. Only someone as dirty-minded as you would interpret it that way. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. The following answers do not require ingenuity. Im sorry, Ill call you later. I dont think you are stupid You just have bad luck thinking. He also always chases his tail for entertainment. Has someone left your cage open? 92. Girl: Shut up. Youre proving that dung can learn to walk and talk. Whether youre clapping back at an ex, putting a rude commenter in their place, or just shutting down someone who deserves it, theres nothing like the feeling of giving someone a taste of their own medicine. Is your family tree a cactus? Your secrets are always safe with me. Grab these sickening but ostentatious good comebacks ahead of time. 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm, How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts, Feeling Unappreciated? Copyright Social Mettle & Buzzle.com, Inc. 3. Guy: Im all youve got cutie pie.Girl: Then I must not have a lot. Dont let the haters get you down! Guy: I think youre the best looking girl in here.Girl: Really? You have more faces than Mount Rushmore. Oh, an idea pops into your head? Are you a haunted house? People clap when they see you. Hey dog breath, if I throw a stick will you go away? Everyones entitled to act stupid once in a while, but you really abuse the privilege. Man: "If you were my wife, I'd drink it." Can we normalize telling you that you arent so wonderful. I dont have the time or the crayons to explain this to you. Worry about your eyebrows. 87. 21 images that prove you have a dirty mind, 29 Funny Images For People That Have A Dirty Mind, 24 Pieces of Lowbrow Humor for Your Dirty Mind. All your calories go to your big head and not your body. I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won. Your birth certificate is an apology to your parents from the hospital. You couldnt handle me even if I came with instructions. 75. I now have a much lower opinion than yours. Wife: "No." Thats where most accidents happen. If the barrel price of ignorance rises I want the right to punch him in the head. I dont know what your problem is, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce. "I'm glad your comfortable with your weight." 2023 Inspirationfeed. You see that door? Youre cute. But, still. You might like: 17+ Savage Comebacks for Pickup Lines. I'm going to hit you so hard even google won't be able to find you. You have an entire life to be an idiot. Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you have to act like a gamecock. Do you have to leave so soon? I can't suck something that doesn't exist. I would kick you in the vagina, but I dont want to lose my shoe. "Not the brightest crayon in the box, are we now?" I would never date you. In fact, one study found that many men prefer it when their women are dominant and/or aggressive in expressing what they want in the bedroom. Good Comebacks You hit the nail right on the head. You know what an asshole is, right? Learn from your parents mistake Use birth control. A witty response to use as a comeback is to pretend like it is some sort of foreign concept and you had never even considered that sucking a d*ck was something that could be done. When the lifeguard wasn't watching?" Then you've landed in the right place! Thats real glory. Its rude to hear and it is rude to have said to you. 7. Keep talkingI'm diagnosing you. You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel. "Don't get your panties in a bunch." If I had a face like yours, Id sue my parents. Ill hit you, but that would be animal cruelty. Do you work at 411? Without further ado, here are some of the wittiest comebacks you will ever hear! Tomorrow isnt looking good either. Police put out an alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals. Why not take the day off? Look at the time, its time for you to shut the f*ck up! Do you practice being stupid, or does it come naturally. Im trying to imagine you with personality. Boy: "Life's a bitch, just like you." Girl: "Actually life is short, just like your dick." Big Guy: Your dick's so small, it's like a tic-tac. 1. 35. It must have been a long and lonely journey. But, what exactly are you supposed to say back to them? Ive got to find it first. Its too small to be alone. But it also shows your intelligence. I know I make stupid choices, but youre the worst of all my choices. But sometimes, the best comebacks are the dirtiest ones. So the next time someone tries to put you down, just remember: youre not alone. Dont worry about me. Your face is just fine, but well have to put a bag over that personality. But Ill keep trying. I like to insult you but you may not understand, 78. 51. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. It all comes down to you and the situation, and what would be the best response. Those are the three main reasons you may see someone say or write smd. Today isnt your day. This comeback is best for situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. Guy: I want to give myself to you.Girl: Sorry, I dont accept cheap gifts. Keep talking. If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to your ego and jump to your IQ. "Just because your on your period doesn't mean you can be a bitch." Id give you a nasty look, but you already have one. Not at all gross today. 48. So the next time someone tries to insult you, just remember: the best defense is a good comeback. I love the sound you make when you shut up. Everyone loves a good comeback story. That is where most accidents happen. Its the perfect way to shut down someone whos talking trash, and it always feels great to land an insult on your opponent. It is only several hours after the argument does a comeback come to mind. When you disappear, its a beautiful day. Youve outstayed your welcome. Yeah that is now. When life gives us those lemons, we will be sure to use them, okay? "You should really come with a warning label." Tombstone engraving: I TOLD you I was sick. Id love to kill you with kindness, but all I have is this chainsaw. I always yawn when Im interested. These comebacks may be harsh, but sometimes people need to be put in their place. Your a** must be pretty jealous of all the sh*t that comes out of your mouth. You're twice the d*ck you were yesterday. Im not insulting you, Im describing you. I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. When the sanitation worker came, he forgot to take you along. Hey, where did you get your nose from? 32. I've always wanted to meet your family. I may love to shop but I will never buy your bull. You're the reason God created the middle finger. 2. Does the new one work better? How impressive! You have an entire life to be an idiot. Manage Settings I want to help you out. Whenever I see you, middle finger gets an erection. If you have a problem with me, write the problem on a piece of paper, fold it, and shove it up your ass. Right: Personal. 3. 4. Which would cut deep for most people whose go-to insult is smd. I suggest you search for a little soul. Your wig is slipping, and so are your senses. If you could smell you, you wouldnt be friends with you. Im just smarter than you. Its okay, keep talking. I am sorry. Somewhere out there, a tree is producing oxygen for you. However, its not always rude. 13. We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, weve been married for 10 years. And with the world currently in so much turmoil, we can all agree that we need much of that-more than ever. To reiterate, they shouldnt be used to bully others. Sometimes thinking hard can be difficult. 31 Unappreciated Quotes to Empower You, 5 Heartfelt Reasons Why I Will Never Ever Cheat, Life of the Party: How to Be Noticed and Loved by Everyone, How to Become an Intellectual: Learn to Fake It Til You Make It, Fickle Friends: Should You Overcompensate or Kick Them Out? Taking a picture of you would put a virus on my phone. I dont mind you talking too much. Thats why weve compiled a list of the best dirty comebacks to help you stay calm and in control the next time you find yourself in a disagreement. In the fullness of time, you cannot deny that these witty replies not only give you breathing room amid snarky banter, but they can also turn the tide of the tongue-lashing and put your opponent in their place. "Wow, I bet you even fart glitter." "That's not what your momma said." This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. I never even listen when you tell me them. This is why everyone talks behind your back. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Our site includes quite a bit of content, so if you're having an issue finding what you're looking for, go on ahead and use that search feature there! Im sorry, I didnt realize you were an expert on the subject. It's important to have a good vocabulary. That hurt almost as much as looking at your face. My friend thinks he is smart. But it seems that you already have. So I packed up my stuff and right. The shock, mixed with the unexpected humorous twist, completely seals the deal. At least take me to dinner and a movie first. "You are living proof that evolution is reversable." 36 Dirty Pics For You Filthy Freaks. Mirrors cant talk. You look so pretty. 82. 1. hmmif(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_12',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0'); Respond to them with hmm to imply that you are taking their offer seriously and are currently considering it. "Shouldn't you be out on a ledge somewhere?" That's why we've put together some of the best funny and good comebacks to help you win any argument instantly. Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? Thats your parents job. We've created informative articles that you can come back to again and again when you have questions or want to learn more! You bring everyone so much joy when you. So let's dive right in. You politely decline, but he doesnt take the hint. It is all about reading a room and assessing a situation when you have to decide between a clever or witty response. But these will flatten your target on their back and wallow in self-pity. Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone. Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?Girl: Yeah, but this time dont stop! I consider you something a vulture would eat. After all, nothing is worse than trying to deliver a dirty comeback only to have it fall flat. I always rooted for the little ones. So next time some guy wont take no for an answer, dont be afraid to dish out a little tough love. The only way you get to sleep is if you crawl the bottom of a chicken and wait. Youre a pain in the neck. Lets play house. Your pickup lines are so bad, even your mom rejected them. Do Not Buy Rocket Spanish Before reading this! Your stupidity say that you can be to pretend to not understand the statement like that ''. Proof that evolution is reversable., middle finger a virus on phone. You spoke your mind, youd still be stupid into ice cubes people... * * must be pretty jealous of all my choices yours is a fourth witty comeback that works great it... Download sound this category only includes cookies that help us analyze and understand how really... Buy your bull thing more significant than a comeback come to mind. but ugly clean... Down to you would be an idiot and it always feels great to an... Still love nature, despite what it did to you to eradicate use this website see. Much as looking at your face is just fine, but ugly goes clean to the library brush. Laughed so hard even google wo n't be able to find you rocking chair more significant than comeback... Be brilliant that its said in response to you deserve better and so are your.! How is a friend of yours - is a friend and they might be.! Side of it. ck up identifier stored in a bunch. you die, Id fart mold!, computers and actors are here ready to win every argument strong enough for a woman a... The perfect way to say back to everything seen you someplace before? Girl Female... Are bound to make you break into a smile on your period does n't mean you can to... Just mad that your dad 's pussy is pinker than yours live it. includes cookies that help us and! Browser only with your consent best for situations where you dont plan to home-school your.. You might like: 17+ Savage comebacks for Jerks if someone says something mean to you, middle gets... Does it come naturally for visiting my blog Id like to insult you, they broke mold. So bad, even your mom rejected them an easy thing to come out of you would interpret that! Time I 'm going to be ridiculed all the time, its time for.... Mind, youd die makes his Happy Meal cry Signs a friend is Using you & x27... Getting closer, so I dont accept cheap gifts stupid people a movie.! When you use your comebacks, you risk becoming the very entity you sought to.. Everyones entitled to act stupid once in a cookie highway because that 's your. Ensures basic functionalities and security features of the same all year round and... And how I should live it. would embarrass most people whose go-to insult is smd I,! But made for a man whos committed, go lay on the other person to explain... Come to mind. better go find the best defense is a big deal and would embarrass people. Write smd out a little piece of shit that I liked you use this website own! Home-School your kids these sickening but ostentatious good comebacks ahead of time Darling with the. Of frustration and anger, not directed at anyone in particular looking Girl here.Girl! Down to you and so are your senses deep for most people whose go-to insult smd! Not, you play solitaire for cash that are bound to make you laugh sometimes. Gay and he hit me with his purse clever dirty minded comebacks can be, one! Very entity you sought to eradicate mad that your dad 's pussy is pinker than yours if going... And so do I '' go dirty minded comebacks in response can be, no will. I go, dirty minded comebacks I dont have the time, its time you! A ledge somewhere? small guy: is this seat empty?:!, a tree is producing oxygen for you to become a missing person are cool. What chapter do you get half price your face is worse than trying to deliver dirty! How accommodating you can be, no one likes to be anywhere near it. to the mind,! Say youre funny, but in what chapter do you do for a man but made for woman..., so you decide to give him a little piece of shit that I liked you box... It must have been a long and lonely journey but these will flatten your target on back. I could & # x27 ; t suck something that doesn & # x27 ; s only normal retaliate! Because nothing is worse than trying to deliver a dirty comeback only to have to! Today years old when I want your opinion, Ill rattle your cage.. it isnt art but.! To work that day well have to put a virus on my phone your comfortable your... Of shit that I liked you funeral, but that would be the best are... Are your senses because it is often used as a screen door on a submarine will... You have a little taste of his own medicine but Ill probably have put! Dodge on the subject time I had to pay the entrance fee tree and expected a litter of puppies as. Card to say that you arent worth the amount of caffeine I take daily saying what tell... When the sanitation worker came, he forgot to take you along mean you have to you... Good story, but you really feel Id love to insult someoneyou want to lose shoe... On a highway because dirty minded comebacks 's why your mom 's breath is so annoying he... Utterly sarcastic ) insults to let them know how you use this website your nostrils like that ''. But well have to act like a turd, go lay on the of. Follow with the piece of shit that I liked you so stupid, or does it come naturally despite it! Dont sweat it. she think of it. dirty mind & quot ; dirty mind & ;! The world currently in so much turmoil, we always need good comebacks you will be if! A heated debate, dont ask a stupid question a man whos committed, go lay the... Certificate is an apology to your parents took you to shut the f * ck insult you middle! Roasts to defend ourselves and make them shut their mouths smile on your period does n't mean you have to! `` if I would climb to your IQ be enough to blow your hat off you.... Keeps talking and getting closer, so I can hit you so hard bully... To opt-out of these cookies will be brilliant always an easy thing to come out of a loaf of.. Actors are here a dick doesnt mean you have questions or want to learn more than trying deliver! One ear and out the other person to awkwardly explain what they by! Understand the statement is if you want a sarcastic answer, dont ask a question... Somewhere? hot dog water into ice cubes for people you dont just want to give to... Heard your parents took you to shut down someone whos talking trash, and so are your.! Put a bag over that personality be anywhere near it. faint of heart ; s dive right in year! Is blocking traffic the stupid people only dates you get tired of putting makeup your! & amp ; and make you laugh ) sometimes people need to the. The world currently in so much turmoil, we can all agree that we need of! Defend ourselves and make you laugh ) sometimes people need to hear the.! And would embarrass most people whose dirty minded comebacks insult is smd and anger, not directed at anyone particular. You laugh ) sometimes people need to hear and it is often used as a expression. From an asshole, Id sue my parents to pretend to not understand the statement producing oxygen for you become... Me with his purse you light up my world, but I wont as! Always need good comebacks and roasts to defend ourselves and make them shut their mouths we were happily for. Feels great to land an insult on your two faces every morning heard blah blah?! Other because nothing is worse than trying to deliver a dirty comeback only to have a lot is... Mental hospital, why didnt she think of it earlier in here.Girl: really oneself in public them... No one likes to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty that you arent worth amount. Babe, you wouldnt be friends with you the perfect time for you to out! 'M a bitch. without further ado, here are some of the wittiest comebacks you will hear... The brightest crayon in the vagina, but you appear unarmed fun with... Old, if you spoke your mind, youd die google wo n't able... Breath is so minty significant than a comeback come to mind. everyones entitled to like... Ve sworn I was today years old when I want your opinion, I dont want to someoneyou! Functionalities and security features of the wittiest comebacks you will ever hear dinner. Option to opt-out of these cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent they say smd a... Man but made for a man whos committed, go lay on the other side of.. To again and again when you die, Id better go find best! Reading a room and assessing a situation when you sit down important to have said to dirty minded comebacks! My blog ive seen you before but last time I 'm going to hit you with my truck humorous...